Snuffy "Big Red" Hamsworth

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Snuffy "Big Red" Hamsworth

Troop: The Bacon Brigade

Position: Tactical Supply Officer

Height: 1 foot, 8 inches

Weight: 25 pounds

Born: November 11, 2025, Patriot Acres, USA

Bio: Raised on a steady diet of liberty and corncakes, Snuffy "Big Red" Hamsworth became a logistics genius after completing The Swine Command Academy. He's known for stockpiling more hay than an entire regiment could consume.

Favorite Color: Patriot Green

Favorite Hobby: Creating intricate mud sculptures of the Statue of Liberty.

Trivia: Once delivered 100 pounds of apples to the frontlines in under 20 minutes while singing "God Bless America."

Anecdote: Once successfully traded 10 bushels of corn for a brand new tractor by negotiating with a neighboring farm's rooster.

Quote: “If it’s got stars and stripes, it’s got my snout on it!”